When couples separate or divorce it is critical to put together a shared parenting plan that meets the CHILD’s needs, not yours! Over the years research has shown that children from divorce will negatively be impacted. It is challenging for parents to decide how they will divide the time with their children. They fear the loss of their relationship and they are also concerned about the negative impact it will have. They couldn’t agree on things while they were together how much more difficult will it be when the most precious thing in their lives is taken into consideration?
This is the time where emotion, hate, bitterness, anger, hurt, and selfishness needs to be put aside. We know that children do their best when they have stability with both parents and meaningful interaction with them – divorce and separation can take that away.
Co-Parenting – What Children Need
- Children do their best when both parents have a stable and meaningful involvement in their children’s lives.
- Each parent has valuable and different contributions to make to their children’s development.
- Children should have structured, routine time as well as unstructured time with each parent.
- If both parents work then it is important to find a daycare provider that you both can agree on, one that is easily accessible to both parents.
- Children have developed relationships with family members, friends, and siblings – it is important for them to be able to maintain these relationships in a positive manner.
- Parents need to be able to communicate and cooperate when it involves their children.
- Both households should feel secure to the children and share the same rules and values.
- Allow your children to bring personal items from one place to the other without worrying about who bought what.
- Over time, parenting plans may need to be adjusted to better suit the children and family members’ needs.
Children are HARMED when they are exposed to conflict between their parents. Don’t argue or fight in front of your children when picking them up or talking on the phone when they can hear you.
The Essense of Good Parenting…
Is to reassure your children that they are loved, cared for and protected by BOTH parents.
Massachusetts Association of Family and Conciliation Courts